ACK! BlogHerNot 2008 is just a few days away, and I haven’t even BEGUN to pack. I just KNOW there’ll be hot tubbing and I’m in desperate need of a new swimsuit. And it sounds like everyone’s getting manis and pedis and cuts and colors and …
*sigh*
Which is why I’m happy to report the BlogHerNot 2008 theme is Come As You Are. Because partying in your PJs is waaaay more comfortable than tit-high Spanx. (Sorry Crash Test Mommy — if it’s any consolation, you’ll look waaaay hotter than any of us.)
And because I have a burning desire to cut to the chase, here are just a few of the topics included in this year’s “Things You REALLY Want To Know” series:
Secrets of A-List Bloggers
Take Photos of Your Dogs! Write Letters to Your Kid! Work From Home and Make $40K Per Month!
Hit Men For Hire
How to Silence Trolls, Plagiarisers and Freakshows Forever
What’s So Funny ‘Bout Peace, Love & Understanding?
How to Play Nice with Others in Bloggywood. Because Rudeness Is SO 2007.
Twitter Etiquette
Stalker Do’s and Don’ts
Earning a Living
25 Proven Traffic Boosters Beginning with Naked Photos
Approval Seekers Rehab
Tips and Tricks of a Successful Comment Whore
Additional topic suggestions are welcomed and encouraged.
And at the end of the day, we’ll convene for a night of doog debauchery and blogga craziness to rival any BlogHer Conference, past or present. I’m hoping, if we promise to clean up after ourselves, Mrs. G will let us use her Women’s Colony. Cross your fingers …
You’ll see. You won’t even miss San Francisco. I promise to have photos to prove it.
UPDATE: Hold on to yer panties … Mrs. G has officially agreed to let us use the Colony. Because she RULES.
Mommy Pie 
So, these photos of my dogs…would that be, like, my *actual dogs or, like, my ROLL DAWGS? Because there is a difference, even for a hermit like me.
Also, I’m skipping the Comment Whoring discussion because hello? I’m already a total comment whore. Wait, do you mean whoring FOR comments or leaving comments all over the blogosphere like a whore spreading commentydiaphilis?
Crap. Maybe my plan to skip that lecture to get hammered and tweet (twit? twitter?) all my random drunken thoughts is ruined. Then again, it kind of applies either way, so yeah.
Clearly, I have NAILED incoherent commenting at 3 am.
Steph, it’s unanimous. Clearly, you have the talent, experience, and stamina to serve as Comment Whore Class Instructor.
I think I love you.
Will there be swag bags? And FYI to my future BlogHerNot roommate, I snore when my allergies are flaring ad sometimes sleep in the buff.
Mel, meet pajama momma. (See below)
Since we’ll already be in our pajamas, do we have to brush our teeth?
And don’t forget the meet and greet throw down! Watermelon margaritas and frozen bushwackers by the gallons for everyone. Not to mention the tons of wonderful appetizer type foods (which will eclipse all of the finger food stuff available in that other place) I’m warming up the blender now! …well right after I get my mani and pedi.
Now these are topics I want to hear about! I thought my life was worthless since I couldn’t attend the *other* conference. Thank you Mommy Pie for making my life worthwhile! 😉
I’m in. Can I register?
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I sleep nekkid. Anyone mind?
PJ Momma, meet Mel, A Dramatic Mommy (see above).
Yes, I’m in. I love it. The topics are fabulous, and that first comment is LOL. Maybe that’s a subtheme: Are you whoring FOR comments? Or just a comment whore?
I’m already a successful comment whore! I might be schmoozing instead during that one.
Somehow we need to exchange our bloggy business cards! Um, if I had one. How about virtual cards?
A topic for your consideration:
“Phone It In!”
How to rest on your laurels after your glory days have passed.
(Sorry. Wednesday is “Snarky Day” in the San Diego Mommason household)
Doods. I am in.
I take pics of my dogs. I have to work on the letters to my kid, though.
Since I’m one of the three people NOT going to Blogher, the Colony is open for business!
Yee hoo! Thanks Mrs. G — as usual, you rule.
I’ll bring the lobster (’cause you know, I gotta be representin’ the great state of Maine, yo!), but I refuse to boil the nasty little suckers.
And who knows, maybe my time at Bloghernot ’08 will allow me to once and for all wean the booby monster. Or not.
How about a topic on driving cross country in someone else’s car meeting all the doogs that enable me? Too harsh?
Brill.Eee.Ant!!!
No packing… Check!
Show up in jammies…Check!
Bad hair day? NP!
I cannot wait to make all dem beyotches jealous right here from home. Someone’s gotta make damn sure that we have more fun then them, so I’ll sign up to multi-task here http://www.kirtsy.com/podcast-en.php and ratchet up the friendly, online fun-o-meter at The Manor, courtesy of MommyPie’s creative genius. Wheeee!! I lurves me a par-tay where I don’t have to get dressed up!!!
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What about a class about how to nicely bitch about your in laws without telling anyone that it is your in laws you are bitching about? I could so teach that class, and even one on naming your kid after foods for the WWW. That is if I am not stoned from allergy meds and antibiotics.
As long as I can put my feet up and a G&T down, I’ll be a happy camper. As long as you PROMISE, PROMISE, PROMISE not to make me talk about, listen to, think about, or even appear cognizant of WOMEN’S ISSUES.
‘Cause Foolery is An Equal Opportunity Loony Since 2006.
I’d love to post about Making a Living. Am I qualified even though I’ve only ever gotten one $40 check from Blogher?
Also, let’s FLOOD Twitter with news of our BlogherNot.
40 Bucks?? Doog, that’s more than MOST have ever made blogging. You’re officially an expert. You beat me by … uh … 40 bucks.
And AWESOME idea to flood Twitter – BlogHerNot ’08 — Classes posted Friday morning; party Friday or Saturday … More details to come … yadda yadda yadda.
Ok, if Auds is bringing lobster to represent Maine, I’m bringing “hanging chads” to represent Florida. No need to thank me, it’s the least I could do.
Mel, meet pajama momma. (See below)
hahaha
Can I cover the “Secrets of a Z list blogger”? You know, the one who makes no money at it and has to work outside the home every day?
If not, I can work within one of the other topics. It sounds like fun.
Oooh! Oooh! I’m coming to your place Friday — I’m a Z list blogger too! Do it!!
awesome!
since it seems my only real “talent” is bitching about my husband and my in-laws, perhaps i can lead a little breakout session? How To Use The F Word At Least Five Times Per Post…
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