The elephant in the room.

Okay, so here’s the deal. The trip to Connecticut to see The Boy didn’t go all that well.

What we THOUGHT would be our first taste of “real life,” turned out to be anything but, I’m afraid. With MP not in her summer preschool program, that meant she was with me 24/7.

NOT real life.

We spent our days in one of three places: the house, the beach, or the store. The three places I could actually FIND.

NOT real life.

And THAT meant I didn’t have much time to work.

NOT real life.

And THAT meant I was stressed and feeling like I had a ton to do each night … just about the time The Boy was ready to quit HIS day and relax. Which left him feeling ignored.

Throw a set of seven-year-old twins into the mix, neither of whom take their muddy shoes off in the house, eat junk food, and don’t brush their teeth at night, and my OCD-riddled brain came close to spontaneously combusting.

Breaking point was about the tenth night MP woke up scared and I brought her to bed. Yeah, didn’t go over all that well. The Boy is NOT a happy sleeper.

Oh, and did I mention the scorching case of poison ivy I’m STILL toting around? And the bug bites? And that it RAINED nearly the entire time? Overcast, gloomy, dark, wet and humid. Not my idea of paradise.

This would be an appropriate moment to use one of my most-hated words. Moist. Connecticut is moist.


So, we’re chillaxin’. We both agree last month kinda sucked. Since then, we’ve each used the phrase “it’s going to take some adjustment,” more times than not. He needs to remember what it’s like to have a five-year-old, and I need to deal with a little dirt and a whole new set of parenting rules. (The not brushing at night though, that’s gonna be tough.)

I guess this is what happens when you change your entire life at age 41.


Hip, hip, boo.


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19 responses to “The elephant in the room.

  1. Eww. That sounds pretty much non-awesome.

  2. Connecticut is moist. I would much rather live in Montana….and the adjustments don’t sound so good. Thinking of you….

  3. That sounds like it was a lot things working against the real life scenario.

  4. Well. Since I wasn’t reading any posts or FB updates with unicorns and and rainbows…I kinda feared for the worst. And apparently it was…

    BUT. Don’t give up yet.
    It was not a realistic trail. For all the reasons you stated. It never comes easy. Nothing good ever does.

    And don’t worry. My minister license is good for 3 years. 🙂

    Hang in there. Both of you.
    If it is meant to be…it shall be. With mud, and stress and of course….laughter. Always remember the laughter.

    thinking of you both.

  5. Andi

    This is the very reason why CCB and I have decided to get acclimated to “real life” in small doses… a week here, a week there. We have moved up to being together one week out of every month, and in a few months will try two weeks out of every month. Because it takes some time to get used to things.

    Try again in a month or two. Just don’t stay as long that time, and see if that helps.

  6. Katherine

    Well Boo. Glad your back. But that must have sucked. Keep your head up though. And more wine!


    I think its always hard to merge your life with another, and you are probably going to have to compromise ALOT. It sucks but you gotta give a little on the things you are willing to adjust to. And stand your ground on the things that are important to you (like teeth brushing nightly! eck…dental hygiene is a must). As long as the good outweighs the bad its worth working out.

  8. SingleMom

    Hi there – I can’t help but chime my two cents in. I am originally from the midwest, Dallas area, and I moved to Connecticut about 5 years ago. My advice is — don’t move to Connecticut! In general (and I know it’s never good to make generalities) but IN GENERAL, people in Connecticut are much more unfriendly as compared to midwesterners. Here’s my observations in a nutshell – In the midwest, if two strangers are walking towards each other on the same sidewalk, it is considered rude if you do not look the other person in the eye and say hello. In Connecticut, it is considered rude if you DO look the other person in the eye. It’s a whole, “don’t invade my space… don’t incite me, what the hell do you want…” mentality. I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve held the door for little old ladies and they blow by me like they are entitled, whereas in the midwest, they would just be grateful with a simple thank you. Like I said, just my humble opinion, but make him move to you!!!

    • Okay, that was my exact impression. The Boy and I both agree that CT ain’t no MT. Here in MT, if you pass someone walking down the street, you say ‘hi’ and don’t think twice. People say ‘hi’ back. You wave to cars in your neighborhood. They wave back. And you don’t feel like an a-hole.

  9. Oh Poo. I was hoping it had gone better. But, from my perspective? All that was real life. Because real life is messy and complicated and takes work to go smoothly and even when it does go smoothly there’s still a bump here or there and can I run the sentence on any longer?

  10. theboy

    But Mommypie is still the bestest evah girl I evah met.

  11. Michelle

    Ummmm see that comment right up there from the boy? That’s a helluva good reason hang in there, just take it one day at a time. Coming from a girl who has been through all kinds of blending of families, it’s never roses overnight. Handle your children and each other with care during the adjustment, the rest will work itself out. Promise.

  12. Reality Bites, not just for us Gen Xers from back in our youth, I guess.

  13. Dammit, this would be the PERFECT time for me to be wearing my “Moist and Creamy” t-shirt. And also a good time to note that both “moist” things AND “creamy” things can be VERY good — they don’t always have to be gross or gutter-y. Chocolate cake is BEST when it’s moist, for example. Creamy hot chocolate is le delish.

    See? It’s all about perspective.

    I’m getting you a t-shirt. And I am TOTALLY wearing mine to your wedding.

  14. I was going to comment, but then I saw what Beej said.

    And I cannot follow that act.

    P.S. I don’t care it it applies to chocolate cake, “moist” is still a gross word. As is creamy.

  15. Beej can wear the “Moist and Creamy” shirt while I wear a “Dry and Chunky” one. Which isn’t any better. In fact, it’s worse. But we’ll make great bookends when we crash your wedding.

    WHICH I have confidence will happen. And I’ll be the crazy person waving to Every. Single. Connecticut. Grumpy. Non-Waver. In my “Dry and Chunky” wedding t-shirt.


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