No More Cottage Cheese Please

For this month’s contribution to Hot Mamas Know, I offer THE absolute best cellulite-buster around, Bliss Spa’s FatGirlSlim.

fatgirlslim.jpg

Here’s what the Bliss Spa web site says:

This advanced-technology adipose antagonist (which, in layman’s terms, means it visibly diminishes those dastardly dimples) features QuSome-encapsulated caffeine molecules for quick and targeted delivery of the skin-slimming stuff of choice of supermodels, spokespeople and other celebs.

Clinical studies show (after 28 days):

87% saw a firming effect
85% felt a slimming effect
73% noticed a reduction in the appearance of cellulite

Sound too good to be true? I was skeptical too, but I’m here to tell you IT WORKS!

Why yes, I do write copy for Ron Popeil. Thanks for asking …

Supposedly it’s the caffeine that’s key. I don’t care what makes it work, with my Hawaiian BFFs vacation (ooh, I need to fill you in on that one) fast approaching, I’m going to start up the regimen again as soon as my order arrives. (I usually only use it during the summer, when the world is exposed to my fright show mayo legs.) $29 for a 6 oz jar – an additional $20 gets you the ‘slimulator’ too, which I also use.

And no, it’s not what you’re thinking, you gutter hussies.

Wait. That’s me.

Anyhoo, all well worth the money.

It’s not going to completely erase the lumps and bumps, but if you’re patient, it will diminish them. And it totally reins in the jiggle. It takes about a month to see results, and you need to use it every day, but trust me, it does work. Mommypie wouldn’t dream of steering you hotties wrong!

So, yo! Bliss People! You out there? Feel free to show me some love for that rave review — a tub or two of FGS will do me juuuust fine …

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6 Comments

Filed under Hot Mamas Know

6 responses to “No More Cottage Cheese Please

  1. I wonder if it’s just the skin stimulation that does the trick? All the heavy scrubbing/exfoliating? I may have to try that (not that you could notice since it would be a token effort on my part).

  2. I don’t know, maybe? It’s crazy to me that it works, but apparently the caffeine plumps things up … or something. My mom always used to pound her thighs, and she swore THAT worked …

  3. I’m gonna try it. God know I need less cottage cheese (at least the out of the fridge kind)

  4. I love the part about “totally reins in the jiggle”!! I’ve got jiggle in places that aren’t meant to jiggle…and NO jiggle in places that SHOULD!! ha ha ha

    Thanks for the tip!

  5. I wonder if this stuff comes in industrial size vats?

    Wait a sec, I just did the math for the amount of that stuff I’d need in order to make a visible difference…I’d have to take out a second mortgage.

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