Doogs Weekend #10: Quick, what’s your porn name?

I don’t know why this exercise gives me so much joy, but it does. Here’s how you figure it out.

First Name = Name of your first pet.

Last Name = Name of the first street you lived on.

Hi. I’m Harry Salvador.

rjgross

Okay, so that’s really Ron Jeremy. Who’s REALLY a porn star. (Don’t ask how I know this. I wish to God I didn’t.) This guy’s living proof that if you want something bad enough, anything’s possible. If you want a good (but gross) laugh, click here for his stats. I particularly enjoy, “Jeremy’s love for food led him to release a line of condiments, the first of which was a hot sauce.”

Dream the impossible dream …

I digress. I think he looks more like a Harry Salvador. What’s YOUR porn name?

Image borrowed from these guys.

59 Comments

Filed under Doogs Weekend

59 responses to “Doogs Weekend #10: Quick, what’s your porn name?

  1. Mine is Jules Ash. I like yours better.

  2. That’s actually a really pretty name — sounds like n E! Entertainment reporter or something.

  3. Hi, I’m Tom 8 inches… okay I added the ‘inches’ it was just 8th st.

  4. If you must know, it’s Kitty Edgewood…I played a socialite-turned porn star on the soap opera “As the Stomach Turns”.

  5. andij1967

    My name is Lady Strong. Cuz, you know, that’s how I roll.

    Also, I knew who Ron Jeremy was, too. What is wrong with us??

  6. Um, we’re Rennaisance Women?

  7. Pierre Brittany. Which is not only stupid, but looks like I tried to make it up. Which I did not. I swear. I had a French poodle. It was a boy. And I only knew one French boy name to name him.

    I sort of want a do-over on naming the dog I got when I was five.

  8. Rick's Cafe

    Napoleon Meadowbrook, but my friends call me Nappy.

  9. Hi, it’s Kelly Brookwood here. Boring. Snore. Who wants to see HER strip? :)

  10. Ally Ambush…sounds pretty good, huh?!?!

  11. I’m Suzy Seminole.

    That sounds more like an Eskimo name. Maybe I’m an Eskimoan Porn Star.

    Ice cubes, baby!

  12. Oh my — mine is Buffy Chapel!

  13. MichelleB

    Mine is June Ellwood!

    After me and my hubby celebrated our 10th anniversary and he surprised me with a gorgeous diamond engagement ring from http://www.idonowidont.com I surprised him with a new dog.

    So we named her June. I’ll ask what my hubby wants his name to be!

  14. Judy Canyon. If that’s not a great porn name, I don’t know what is.

  15. Hi, I’m Amber El Rey. Pleased to meet you. Let’s do it.

    (I use my porn name ALL the time. I have an unusual name and Amber is much easier at Starbucks or when ordering Chinese.)

  16. YoYo Indiana, here. Pleased to meet you.

  17. Whiskers Morgan.

    Ew.

    Nobody wants to see Whiskers naked.

  18. I’m Whiskey Hunt , But if you want the whole name of my first dog then it woud be Sir Winston Whiskey Bow Wow Lesinski-HUNT.!

  19. Candy Louisiana.
    LOVE IT!
    I also have a friend whose porn name is Patrick Platinum. Yes, all the boys what that porn name.

  20. I’m Barbie Broadway. I think I missed my calling.

  21. Hi! I am Buffy Hardee.
    Yikes!

  22. Finn

    Teaberry Stanley. Yeah, that get’s you excited!

  23. P.S. Is that a Harry Salvador in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

  24. Buster Becky. Would’ve been better the other way around.

  25. OMG I’m crying reading these.

    Mine is Star West. I could be the next guest Porn Star on the View!

  26. Why does everyone have a great porn name except me?

    Seriously, who wants to do it with Nugget Terrace?

    It sound like a place to poo.

  27. HOWLING at all these. These names deserve a post all its own. Seriously. Funny. Stuff.

  28. Okay, I’ll bring you out of it:

    Tober County Road HH.

    Yeah. It’s like thinking about baseball, only faster.

  29. Um, Holy Cold Shower, Buttman.

  30. another co-worker

    Booga Pemberton. Hmmm…

  31. Nappy

    Ya know what they say about the people who’s names don’t “sound” like porn stars……..:)))

  32. Are you ready for this??? Bo Forest. Yup, that’s me. Love this post.

  33. Ok, I have to share HubbyBee’s name, cause I can’t decide if it’s funny or awful…
    Fat Cat Glass.
    wowza.

  34. Oh shit
    I’m Lulu Entrada
    WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

  35. Snoopy Tasker. Weeeeeiiiiirrrrdddd.

  36. Finn

    My hubby is Everett Martha Washington. WTF???

  37. ali

    haha. mine’s funny. smoothie clovernook. but i always thought your porn name was first pet + mother’s maiden name and that your celebrity name was your middle name + street you grew up on.

    i know this because my friend’s first pet was thumper and his mother’s maiden name is Good….therefore his porn name? thumper good. doesn’t get much better than that!

  38. doog, i’m totally late to the game, but i’m here. here to share my hideously LAME porn name.

    Samantha Tower.

    wtf.

  39. wait, we moved when i was 18mos to that street… and, evidently we had a pet there.

    Flecka Lado de Loma.

    now THAT is impressive… yet not sexy in any way.

  40. I’m Snowball Country.

    Hawt, right?

  41. Wouldn’t mayo have been a more appropriate condiment?

    For that matter, wouldn’t a line of condoms been more appropriate and on message with his brand?

  42. I am Fi Fi Hayland.

    Should I be wearing a beret or a straw hat? Both would be equally appealing in my next porn video.

  43. Jim H.

    Oh man… I’m Petunia Fowler.

  44. Margo

    Buffy Prairie. It has a ring to it.

  45. Steve

    Well that would make me Jaguar Englewood. Sounds like a Brazilian tranny.

  46. Mine is Ginny Ohio. Not nearly as exotic sounding like so many.

  47. Pretty Boy Paradise. Which I have to say…is just an awesome porn name.

  48. thetick

    Hubert the 14th. I miss Hubert. He was a weiner dog.

  49. silverarrow

    Mine is Bear Meadows.

    Definitely sounds dirty.

  50. kookimebux

    Hello. And Bye. :)

  51. Sebastián

    Camila Bermudez :O
    I sound like a hot latina.
    But I’m a man :(

  52. SouperG

    how about…

    … Ambrosia Steele

    Oh yes thats nice and hot ^^ named after my fish…great

  53. Hokwei

    Diggz Burbank at your service…

  54. Funny

    Rod Longjohn, says everything… twice!

  55. Sco

    Fluffy Gardner, at your cervix. Not bad, eh?

  56. My nookie days are over
    My pilot light is out
    What used to be my sex appeal
    Is now my water spout.

    Time was when, on its own accord
    From my trousers it would spring
    But now I’ve got a full-time job
    To find the blasted thing.

    It used to be embarrassing
    The way it would behave
    For every single morning
    It would stand and watch me shave.

    Now as old age approaches
    It sure gives me the blues
    To see it hang its little head
    And watch me tie my shoes.

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  58. Very informative post, thanks for your good blog…

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