Nothing Says St. Patty’s Like Green Pants and A Bag ‘o Trash

Cut to 7:50 a.m. Slap a pair of pants on MP. They’ve been in hiding awhile, but are the right color — green being the primary objective this morning.

late late late late

8:05 a.m. Drag a week’s worth of garbage to the car. Heave it into the back. Plan to drop it off at the end of the driveway on my way out.

late late late late

8:20 a.m. Arrive at preschool. Notice MP’s pants are two sizes too small. And green no less. With horror, I realize she is the spitting image of my horrid four-year-old ’70s polyester dressed self.

late late late late

8:26 a.m. Kiss MP and her floods goodbye (three hugs, three kisses), pry her tiny fingers from around my neck, put her in the arms of her favorite teacher and leave her in tears. (Turning four has not been easy on either one of us.)

late late late late

8:31 a.m. Feel the usual drop-off guilt, run to the exit, nearly topple a pregnant woman and toddler in my spastic rush, apologize profusely and race to the car.

LATE LATE LATE LATE

8:32 a.m. On the road again. Something stinks. Damn. The garbage.

LATE LATE LATE LATE

8:37 a.m. Arrive at work.

……………………………

Cut to 11:40 a.m. Leave office for lunch. Head to the car.

11:41 a.m. DAMN. The GAAARRBAAAAAGE.

11:46 a.m. Find random dumpster immediately, ditch the trash, decontaminate the car, resume breathing through nose.

12:02 p.m. Lunch. Drive Thru Taco Guy tells me he likes my hair way better curly … the way I’m wearing it today. I am mortified. Clearly, I have an addiction.

…………………………….

Cut to 5:45 p.m. MP and I head home. She’s happy and goofy and (thankfully) it’s the perfect end to an otherwise imperfect Monday.

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4 Comments

Filed under Bits and Pieces

4 responses to “Nothing Says St. Patty’s Like Green Pants and A Bag ‘o Trash

  1. Taco Bell guy would probably love you with your stinky garbage too. Maybe even if you were wearing the flooder green pants too.
    At least if your Taco Bell guy is like my Subway guy.
    He knows how I like my Banana Peppers.
    gah.

  2. Brilliant! This post is so perfect in capturing the daily grind.

  3. Deb

    Can I have that pillow?

  4. Moosh – You totally inspired me to veer off course and hit Subway today – my arteries and the extra lbs on my butt thank you.

    OK – Ya made my day :)

    Deb – I don’t know why I thought it was so freakin’ funny, but that comment still has me laughing out loud. (Oh, and it’s a Grammy original …)

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